luxembourg

Everything I ever heard about Luxembourg is true.

Considering I’ve never really heard anything about Luxembourg except that they have an exceptional GDP per capita, that wasn’t bound to be hard.

Here's a conveniently numbered list of the things I now know:

1.       The big hostel is at the bottom of the valley.

2.       Everything other than the big hostel is at the top of the valley.

3.       The number 21 bus doesn’t go to the hostel. It stops a few kilometres away, at a place called the Cultural Centre that appears to be neither cultural nor central.

4.       12kg packs feel heavier after a few kilometres.

5.       When asking for directions in Luxembourg, ‘straight on, straight on, straight on,’ accompanied by wild sushi-chef chopping gestures is not a good sign. This means you have a long way to go.

6.      It is very possible to spend a day wandering through the old city and the lush green valleys. It is possible to spend two days doing this. Two days is probably enough.

7.      The casemates under the city walls were once the longest in the world, have been used by many occupying countries, house the treasures of the modern national bank, and have a tendency to drip on one’s head. They also foster the ideal conditions for growing mushrooms year-round, which I think is just excellent.

8.      The Museum of the History of Luxembourg City is one of the most flawless examples I’ve seen of an old building that has been modernised yet still retains its character and history.

9.      Luxembourgers retain the European obsession with bread and all its wheat-based cousins. Perhaps it’s even stronger here than elsewhere. 

10.   Strongbow tastes exceptional when it’s the first cider you’ve found in Western Europe. It tastes especially exceptional after a few kilometres walk with packs and accompanied by a really fat gluten-free potato and salmon omelette (that didn’t even come with bread, my gosh). Salsa Tapas Bar is in the old town, and is generous with their serving sizes. I respect that.

11.   It’s impossible to feel guilty about eating a huge dessert instead of dinner when you’ve climbed 1000 steps in one day and it’s the only gluten-free option on the menu.

12.   Underground rooms full of dead people are really great. Churches with stained glass do this especially well. The Cathedral is beside the Golden Lady war memorial - both worth a visit.

13.   If anyone is in Luxembourg in the near future they can find my copy of Coetzee's Disgrace wedged between the back bunk and the wall in room 1D. Don’t tell me what happens in the end because I didn’t finish it. Happy reading.